Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
you would pick up someone in the library
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
