i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize