Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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