Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize