I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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