They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
