The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
He felt like a one man threesome
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize