they need to just BURY HIM!
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
