Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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