doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
