Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
