I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
