I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
