Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
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Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
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And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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