idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
