North Korea, Best Korea!
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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