so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
