Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
how does that bad decision feel?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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