Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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