Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
