just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
