but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
