is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
