fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
