ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize
