And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
