It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Randomize
