lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
