I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
