when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
