You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
