just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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