not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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