Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
