Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
