She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Randomize
