sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I'm always down for nudity.
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