i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
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