Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize