HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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