just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize