He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
