k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
