'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
My penis needs a shock collar
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize