its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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