I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
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