You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
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