I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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