have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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