party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
